10 signs you are a people-pleaser – and what to do about it

People-pleasers are people who feel they must do whatever it takes to make the people around them happy. People-pleasers are trapped, insecure, and unstable people. They allow their happiness to be based on other people. It’s okay to have one or two people in your life you want to make sure stays happy. For me, that’s my daughter. It’s a problem if you feel the need to change what you are to please someone else.

10 signs you are a people pleaser.

1. Your happiness depends on the approval and appreciation from other people.
2. You are too quick to say yes and you have a hard time saying no.
3. You are too apologetic.
4. You work harder if it involves helping someone else, but you slack off if it only helps yourself.
5. You feel depressed when you experience criticism or confrontation.
6. You can’t make a decision without consulting other people.
7. You feel you are being taken for granted but you do nothing about it.
8. You care too much about being liked and you fear the loss of approval.
9. You are losing a sense of identity. You’ve been pleasing other people for so long that you lost of little of yourself.
10. You have low self-esteem and lack confidence.

I was a big people-pleaser. I wanted desperately to be liked and accepted by my peers and superiors, but that didn’t get me anywhere in life. It only led me to suffer from severe depression and anxiety. Several years ago, I shifted from trying to satisfy my happiness from anything external to focusing on the development and progression of my soul. Now I follow a simple rule, which is one of the laws of free spirits: people are going to judge you regardless of how you decide to live your life. I no longer have depression or anxiety. People are shocked to find that I even suffered from it.

My happiness is based on two things:

1. Being who I am at this exact moment

2. Having a strong, deep relationship with my Creator.

I no longer allow other people’s judgments or criticisms to have any impact on my state of being. That is the free spirited lifestyle – that is my message.

We all are free, unique, and creative being. You shouldn’t have to explain what you are to anyone; you just need to be you who you are. If you are doing that, then you are showing appreciation to the One who created you.